“Most people around me do not one bit understand what I am doing and why. Because of the discouragement, I tend to lock myself in my house or do everything alone instead but I actually start to feel pretty lonely. When I mention this to friends and family their response is: you are always welcome to hang out/join us for dinner/what not. They don't understand it is emotional loneliness.”
When I read this in one of my groups my heart sank.
My courageous and gorgeous client N had just made the decision to start her online business.
She has been through a lot (like a lot!!!) way more than anyone her age should’ve had to go through. I adore her so much and can’t wait till her powerful business idea becomes reality.
Yet, this is the response that she gets from the people around her:
About her joining B-School:
"But you don't even get a certificate?! Who is this lady anyway?! They just want money!"
About the Energetic coaching I’m doing with her:
"Abracadabra, such nonsense or yeah that might work for some people at best"
About her starting her own business?
"Yeah that can be a nice side job/hobby"
So she asked me "How do I keep the connection with those around me, whilst at the same time focusing on myself, my health and my business?"
Here are my 3 best insights around dealing with people who do not understand you, while you go through a transformational phase in your life:
It is your vision for a reason, it came to you, it is yours and yours only. They simply are not able to get it, because they are not you.
This explains the resistance, the "yea yea, your own business that can be a nice side job/hobby" is a perfect example of their limiting beliefs showing up.
(Imagine their faces when you make 10, 20, 50 K a month with ease, it'll be truly messing with their world view!)
This is what I know. When your vision comes to you, it is vulnerable. Yoú are vulnerable. You gotta protect yourself and your vision, by being really mindful with whom you share what. By all means, share your dreams with people that cheer you on and who have the same mindset. With the others just share what's going well, keep it superficial.
You don't need to stop hanging out with your friends, just don't talk about your business, the courses you're investing in, or how much you pay your coach. Do fun things with them!
Second, be open for new friends. For like-minded people, create your awesome new community that lifts you up and empowers you.
My Q's to you are:
Do you have people around you that do not understand what you do? How do you deal with it? Does it hold you back in any way?
Let me know in the comments, happy to help with finding ways to move through this with ease.